Treating Marriage Like a Car Lease?

A few weeks ago we wrote about a guest column appearing in the Washington Post calling for the creation of “wedleases”–temporary marriages that come with expiration dates.

Proponents liken it to leasing a vehicle. To borrow from Dr. Jennifer Roback Morse, “the analogy works great if you picture yourself as the driver. It stinks if you picture yourself as the car.”

No one wants to think of themselves as “leased” by someone else. But a news outlet in Memphis picked up the wedlease concept this week and featured a story on the subject, writing:

“The state of Tennessee has defined marriage as a contract between a man and a woman, and everything you read in the state statutes refers to marriage as a contract,” said family law attorney Lee-Ann Dobson.

Dobson has seen many Mid-South marriages end up in divorce court for all kinds of reasons. So, since marriage is already a contract, redefine or clearly define the terms? After two or three years, the parties could terminate or renew the contract, just like an apartment lease.

We’ve said it before: Wedleases treat people like property; they attempt the impossible task of “trying” commitment; the breakup is unlikely to be “mutual” when the lease expires; and they fail to fully take into consideration the welfare of children.

If marriages are failing, the solution isn’t to make marriage easier to dissolve. The solution is to help those failing marriages succeed.

Metaxas: Cohabiting “A Poor Substitute for Marriage”

In a column published on Christian Post last week, Eric Metaxas articulates why living together is a poor substitute for marriage itself–and how it sets relationships up to fail.

Metaxas cites an opinion-editorial in the New York Times in which psychologist Meg Jay of the University of Virginia describes the “cohabitation effect”:

“Couples who cohabit before marriage . . . tend to be less satisfied with their marriages-and more likely to divorce-than couples who do not.”

This has been borne out by other studies and experts. As Dr. Jennifer Roback Morse notes in her column “Why Not Take Her for a Test Drive? Cohabitation Fast Facts,” there is a clear correlation between cohabitation and unhappiness and domestic violence. Nevertheless a lot of people picture living together before marriage as a way to take a relationship out for a “test drive.” Dr. Morse sums that point of view up pretty well:

“The analogy works great if you picture yourself as the driver. It stinks if you picture yourself as the car.”